Frozen snow Chapter one

I just wrote this about a few months ago but I never seem to have time to write more but if you like it then I will write more ^^ It's basically something that I like to write cuz it was inspired by Twilight.

It's Romance/superstitions /school life ^^ I just love this story ^^ Hope you like it too!


Frozen Snow

Preface

To think. I caused all of this. If I had never stayed alive, then all of this would have never happened. I don’t deserve to live. I should have died. My heart felt heavy, it feels like I can’t keep it up. Keep it from falling. Moisture filled my eyes. I did not care about the tears as they fell from my eyes. They fell onto his soft cheeks.

His cold dead body laid perfectly still. He looked like a ghost in the light of the moon. Pale and still, his lifeless heart will never beat again. His eyes will never see me anymore.

People hated me, despised me. I despised myself. Why am I like this? Why do I have to hurt all that I loved and all that has loved me? I’m a monster. They blame me. I agree with them. It was all my fault. Wait for me and I will join you my love.

I held a silver dagger high above my head, prepared for death. I had no regrets. I wanted to leave this place forever, so no one would have to suffer for me. I closed my eyes and pulled the blade to my body. As swiftly as I can. I felt nothing. I must have been dead already, but that quick? I didn’t deserve such a painless death.

Then I realized that I cannot die. The curse prevented that. The curse that puts everyone in danger. And leaves me safe, physically. I was hurt, badly. Yet I cannot ease the pain with death…my heart aches. Yet I would live on…painfully.

1. The forest where I stayed

I was thinking of what my life had been like ever since that time. Ever since that year, my 13th year of living, I have never loved anyone. Or try not to. It’s a hard thing to do…while being isolated from everyone around. I longed for someone to talk to, yet I fear that they might end up like the others. I was alone. As far as I was concerned, no one knew that I was human. Some thought of me as a demon sent here to kill those who loved me. Others think I’m just a girl cursed and will live eternally like my existence is nothing. Whatever they thought, they kept a safe distance away from me. Even the teachers acted that way. I knew they felt pity, but also fear. Fear for which they will fall for my innocence and then be cursed to death.

I stumbled out of bed and looked around. How long have I’ve been daydreaming? But how can it be a dream when it was a nightmare. I didn’t want to think about it, but it kept on coming back to me, every time that I was alone and had nothing to keep my mind occupied with. Everywhere I looked it always reminded me of him. My heart ached as the scene of that day replayed in my mind. I was being delirious. There was nothing in this room that could remind me of him. I decided to wash up and go to school.

I dashed to the bathroom, afraid that I would think more of that day if I’d stay there much longer when I’m seeing things. Better clear my head first before I do something dumb. I turned the tap and ran the cold water over my face. Hopefully that would help with all the other things. I finished brushing my teeth and taking a shower, and so I went back to my room to get dressed for school.

The sun was shining through the white curtains that hung over the large window. It was unusual, for it to be sunny at this time of year. What was going to go wrong today? For it to be sunny and warm in January? The others will surely receive good news. And yet, I felt that today was going to be like any other day, but worse, somehow I felt it. Never mind. Thinking about this always hurts my brain. I reached the closet and found my cloths for today. I forced myself to wear a silky blouse, the color of the clouds when it snows, a pale pink, along with a knee long skirt, also pink. I didn’t want to where blue. It always reminded me of his eyes. For three and a half year, I force myself to where something that was other than blue, even though that color was what I loved most.

I walked down stairs veering away from the kitchen. I didn’t feel hungry and didn’t bother with breakfast. Today was such a nice day, why not enjoy it while it lasted this morning. I opened the door leading to the greenhouse. I’ve been keeping this place the same as when my parents were still here. It wasn’t like a greenhouse in appearance though. The walls and roof were made of glass and inside was kind of like a meadow instead of a place for growing plants and stuff. More like an environment. No matter what the weather was outside, with my help, this place stayed the same as always. The small brook that was there calmed my frantic mind. The bubbling of the stream made my mind at peace. The sun was shining extra brightly this morning. Sitting under the shade of this tree was comfort enough. The smell of the flowers overcame my fear of today. I laid there in the shade until it was time to leave for school.

I walked to school as usual, alone. I had no problem with that, but sometimes it gets too lonely. The way there wasn’t that long. All I had to do was cross the forest. No one came this way because of the forest. Living too close to there is not a good thing either. At night, there was said to be loud horrible noises and strange beasts seem to travel through the forest so easily. And I’m not really afraid of the forest, that’s why they gave me a job no one wants. I got paid beyond what would take an average workmen three times as long to reach that amount. I don’t blame them for letting me do this job, this job that is so dangerous to them, I needed to make up for what I’ve caused for the last 16 years.

I reached school just in time. Walking towards the door, I was stopped abruptly by the principal. The expression on his face told it all. The act of sadness appeared on his face, yet his eyes were full of excitement. Was this what the weather had predicted? This was it. I had no doubt. Just exactly what I was looking for.

“Miss Fiona, would you please follow me. I would like to have a talk with you.” his voice calm, but with a hint of accomplishment.

The principal was a well respected man, not the type to judge someone by who they are. He was supposed to be brave…so they say. But I had sense that he feared for his life the day that I walked into the gates to the school. He had no reason to get me out of this school, but now it seems like he had his wish. He had found a way to get rid of me. His faced fell with sorrow, yet his eyes perks with happiness. I just can’t help but feel hated and unwanted.

“As you may know, many of the parents have been complaining that you are a danger to their children. I know this must be hard for you, and I feel solemnly sorry to loose such a bright and wonderful student…Sorry it had came to this.” It was lies, all lies. I can tell.

“But we have found a school that will accept you for now…” Yeah right…for now…

“I know what you’re saying and I know that I should leave. Don’t worry, I won’t come back.” I said biting my lips, hiding the bitterness that lay on the edge of my tongue.

“I took the liberty of ordering the uniform for you and it and the information should arrive by tonight.” The same expression lay on his face. No doubt about it.

“Thank you very much principal. You have done a lot for me. I will be leaving now. Good-bye.” I bowed my head down and turned to the door and left.

What would happen now? This was the third school that had found a way to get rid of me. I guess it won’t be long until the other schools decide that too. I walked out of the building slowly, I didn’t feel like wanting to move at all. Eyes were staring at me, burning into my skin. They were happy…happy that I’m leaving. No I just wanted to get out of here as soon as possible, but my feet won’t move. Standing there like an idiot, I was wondering if they’re laughing at me, in secrecy. Lucky, the bell rang and all of them completely cleared out, leaving me alone in the school yard.

There’s nothing left to do but to go back home. The school yard was silenced. As I walked out the gates, the principal came on the announcements. He was happy, they were all happy. Then there was cheering. I’ve been through this too much to be crying, but I just can’t help but feel hated.

The streets were empty. No one was out here now, not near a deserted forest. Tears kept falling down my face, I can’t stop it. The road twisted and turned, I didn’t know where I was going now. It seemed all so unfamiliar.

I didn’t know how long I’d been walking, but by the time I looked up at the sky, then sun was setting. How time flies. The view of the sun at this point was a reason not to regret getting lost. It was warm against my skin, although there was a chilling mist in the air. The coldness sank into my bones, making me shiver. All of a sudden, it had hit me. I felt sleepy, so sleepy that I didn’t care for where I was at. I was fighting against my eyelids, keeping them from shutting on me. I knew that if I had fallen asleep in here, chances are that I may never wake up.

The mist had overcome me. I felt as if it had taken over my mind, making my decision for me. My eyelids won, I fell into a deep sleep, in a place where the trees have suffered endless torture of the mist. So much that the leaves were black and the wood also. My rest was a nightmare. I was back three years ago in my house, watching him, as he died. There was nothing I could do, nothing at all. It was too late. He was still suffering…I wanted to die along with him but there was nothing I could do. I was useless.

He moved, just like in my memories, but I know this wasn’t just a memory, it was reality. This had happened before, and I was afraid to relive it again. I wanted to run away, not wanting to hear his last words, but I couldn’t move, just like before. Then he began to speak.

His words pierced my heart. “Fiona, It’s not your fault,” he began but I wanted to yell out that it was my fault, but couldn’t. “being with you was worth all of this. It was my fault for being so careless.

“Please don’t blame yourself. Always remember that I loved you and I always will. Even death would not erase the memories of you from me. Remember that I will always be here for you, even if it’s not me.”

Those words pained me the most, even though it was not meant like that. I bent over and gave him his farewell kiss. He smiled and then his angelic face fell into deep sleep, and would never wake up again. This was happening all over again…all like before.

It was cold, all so very cold. Then surprisingly enough, the coldness had vanished, replaced by an unexpected warmth. The dream slipped away as my heart began to beat again. A familiar voice called out to me. A voice that I had known, yet it was imposable! It can’t be! I opened my eyes and was shocked.

Icy blue eyes returned my gaze. “It can’t be.” I whispered, too low for him to hear.

“Are you alright?” It was the same soft tone. It pained me to hear it again “Why were you sleeping in the forest. It’s very dangerous.” His eyes sparked with unnecessary concern. I didn’t notice it, but he was holding me in his arms. He was carrying me out of the forest.

“I’m fine.” I replied, trying not to look in his eyes, yet I could feel the gaze burning through me. “ Thank you for your help, but I think I can walk now.” I tried not to be too nice and yet not mean at the same time. It was hard to keep my voice neutral when he had surprised me so much.

He let me down so that I can walk but still insisted that I follow him to get out of the forest. I felt weak. My bones felt mushy. I tried to take a step but ended up falling. He caught me just in time. My face felt hot. I must be really red right now. Hopefully he can’t see that in the darkness of the night.

He was now holding me in his arms again. His eyes glowed again with concern. I was vexed. How can this be? By the look on his face, I wasn’t very sure about this, but I think that… No. That can’t be. I won’t let that happen. I tried to get myself on the ground again, but his hold was strong. I had never been strong at all. I had never needed strength for people to stay away from me.

He saw what I was doing and stopped walking. “Please don’t move. You’ve been infected with a poisonous plant. Your leg is unable to hold you up. Even if it’s just a scratch, the poison will have great effect. It’s dangerous out here. It’s not safe for you to be out here in the dark Please don’t.” He was determined to keep me safe. His voice was all concern and no anger, just like…no, I don’t want to think about that.

I didn’t object to him anymore, so that he wouldn’t try to talk me out of walking again. I was a coward. I didn’t want to hear that voice anymore, no matter how much warmth it gave me.

There was light at the edge where the forest had ended. We were finally back on the streets again. I was careful not to look at him under the light of the moon. He saw that I was avoiding him but for some reason, one that I might have known, he had the desire to look in my eyes. He held my face so that I had to look directly into his eyes. I tried to look away again, but his hands had not let me go. It was painful…so very painful. He was exactly like him. There was no doubt about it. Tears filled my eyes. He noticed that and dropped his gaze. His hands slipped away from my face. He turned away from me, but just for a moment. That was enough though.

I was able to run away, I had forced myself to move. It was painful…but it was worth it. I was hiding under the shelter of a tree…away from him. I silently slipped away into the darkness, to return to my house.

Tears had fallen upon my face once more. Not because of the pain of my leg, but because now I had found him. I was flummoxed. Why did he have to appear in my life? Not that, but his life will be endangered if he feels like that again.

I left before he had known I was gone.



© Copyright 2008 Yuki Misora (FictionPress ID:608788).